Ray Rice Video - punching his gf

hawknation2014

New member
Joined
Feb 17, 2014
Messages
2,812
Reaction score
0
salamander":38ir4kcg said:
I think it is a mistake to assume this is atypical for domestic violence. I think most domestic violence is as horrible as this or worse. He hit her hard once and it knocked her out. Thankfully he stopped after one blow. I think he should have been punished severely from the outset; a full season suspension, full salary donated to domestic violence organizations, daily anger management/other counseling for the length of the suspension. After the year he must continue counseling (weekly or monthly) as well as perform domestic violence advocacy, talking to players and other groups about the issue. If he violates any of these terms or heaven forbid commits another act, he would be banned for life. This should be consistent for all domestic abuse cases.

I agree, thanks for the answer. Just wanted you to clarify that.
 

nanomoz

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 3, 2007
Messages
7,530
Reaction score
1,442
Location
UT
If Goodell had access to this footage during the course of the original investigation and appeal, he should be fired immediately.
 

sc85sis

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 13, 2010
Messages
8,522
Reaction score
1,382
Location
Houston Suburbs
Let's try to avoid assuming Rice's now wife is a gold digger because she went ahead and married the guy. There are plenty of people who stay in abusive relationships for various reasons. None of us know this woman; we cannot realistically put ourselves in her shoes.

As for Ray, he obviously has issues. Hopefully getting fired will be the wake up call he needs because if it isn't--I don't even want to contemplate that. There is no excuse for abusing another human being, an animal, et al.
 

Cartire

New member
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
4,580
Reaction score
0
sc85sis":2ou698tm said:
Let's try to avoid assuming Rice's now wife is a gold digger because she went ahead and married the guy. There are plenty of people who stay in abusive relationships for various reasons. None of us know this woman; we cannot realistically put ourselves in her shoes.

As for Ray, he obviously has issues. Hopefully getting fired will be the wake up call he needs because if it isn't--I don't even want to contemplate that. There is no excuse for abusing another human being, an animal, et al.

I have an oppisite view of this. She needs to be called out as well when it comes to her decision to both support him, apologize, and remain with him. I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money. But regardless of any of those reasons, these women arent going to change their ways if we dont call it out. We cant constantly enable them by "understanding" their decision. we can be critical of the choices they make as well*.

*Quick note: I dont mean the decisions to lead up to being abused. I mean the decisions to remain with the abuser. So please everyone, dont go all Jezebel on me.
 

Cartire

New member
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
4,580
Reaction score
0
notyou":17kyqi31 said:
http://xfinity.comcast.net/articles/sports-general/20140908/Ravens-Rice.Cut/

BALTIMORE (AP) — Ray Rice was let go by the Baltimore Ravens on Monday and suspended indefinitely by the NFL after a video was released showing the running back striking his then-fiancee in February.

I really feel like you should read through a thread before posting.
 

Hasselbeck

New member
Joined
May 2, 2009
Messages
11,397
Reaction score
4
Cartire":354nwqz1 said:
I have an oppisite view of this. She needs to be called out as well when it comes to her decision to both support him, apologize, and remain with him. I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money. But regardless of any of those reasons, these women arent going to change their ways if we dont call it out. We cant constantly enable them by "understanding" their decision. we can be critical of the choices they make as well*.

*Quick note: I dont mean the decisions to lead up to being abused. I mean the decisions to remain with the abuser. So please everyone, dont go all Jezebel on me.

You don't have an inkling how abusive relationships go. Real easy to say she should just "call him out" and leave .. you, myself and everyone else has no idea what else has gone on in their relationship.. but I'd be very very surprised if this was the first time he's ever physically abused her.

Blaming the woman for any of this is absurd.
 

Cartire

New member
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
4,580
Reaction score
0
Hasselbeck":llyg3ngh said:
Cartire":llyg3ngh said:
I have an oppisite view of this. She needs to be called out as well when it comes to her decision to both support him, apologize, and remain with him. I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money. But regardless of any of those reasons, these women arent going to change their ways if we dont call it out. We cant constantly enable them by "understanding" their decision. we can be critical of the choices they make as well*.

*Quick note: I dont mean the decisions to lead up to being abused. I mean the decisions to remain with the abuser. So please everyone, dont go all Jezebel on me.

You don't have an inkling how abusive relationships go. Real easy to say she should just "call him out" and leave .. you, myself and everyone else has no idea what else has gone on in their relationship.. but I'd be very very surprised if this was the first time he's ever physically abused her.

Blaming the woman for any of this is absurd.

Im not blaming her for the incident. Im irritated about the way she handled the situation afterward. I mean, going into a Ravens press conference and apologizing for her role in it, while simultaneously, her then husband does not apologize.

I find it hard to not be skeptical of the motives. And even if she truly meant it, then maybe she needs these harsh words as a wake up call.
 

salamander

Member
Joined
Aug 27, 2012
Messages
209
Reaction score
6
Cartire":29jjafl6 said:
I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money.

If this was a clear pattern of abuse with Rice I would agree with you, but this could be a single isolated incident. Maybe she just knows him better than you and thinks he wont do it again.
 

Cartire

New member
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
4,580
Reaction score
0
salamander":29ute943 said:
Cartire":29ute943 said:
I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money.

If this was a clear pattern of abuse with Rice I would agree with you, but this could be a single isolated incident. Maybe she just knows him better than you and thinks he wont do it again.

If it was one incident, you would think what she knows about him would have changed dramatically after taht moment. The girl was knocked out cold for over a minute. And the worst part, which I have heard much mention of, Ray doesnt even seem to be concerned for her after the moment. If it was an accident out of a moment of rage, you would think after she went down, he would actually have been concerned with her well being. He does nothing to console her except drag her halfway out of the elevator and then leave her there.
 

salamander

Member
Joined
Aug 27, 2012
Messages
209
Reaction score
6
Cartire":3b97d448 said:
salamander":3b97d448 said:
Cartire":3b97d448 said:
I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money.

If this was a clear pattern of abuse with Rice I would agree with you, but this could be a single isolated incident. Maybe she just knows him better than you and thinks he wont do it again.

If it was one incident, you would think what she knows about him would have changed dramatically after taht moment. The girl was knocked out cold for over a minute. And the worst part, which I have heard much mention of, Ray doesnt even seem to be concerned for her after the moment. If it was an accident out of a moment of rage, you would think after she went down, he would actually have been concerned with her well being. He does nothing to console her except drag her halfway out of the elevator and then leave her there.


I think they were both drunk.
 

kearly

New member
Joined
Mar 6, 2007
Messages
15,975
Reaction score
0
Seahwkgal":a25n0s3i said:
I also want to speak my piece about this. As a former victim of domestic violence(you don't have to be married to qualify), I cannot understand how that woman married him. That is crazy! Also, I abhor violence of any kind and a woman that hits a man is just as guilty. There is no need to strike or punch anyone unless it's purely for self defense and I don't care what genitals are between the legs. Next up: Ray McDonald.

I'm sorry to hear about your past history. I agree with you about abuse being intolerable, regardless of gender, regardless of it being physical or emotional. I think we have a bit of a problem in our culture in that we focus on one gender and one specific type of abuse, when a much wider swath of abuse should be demonized equally.

As far as why she still married Rice, I can think of a few million reasons why. Sorry '85sis, there's just no way that money was not a factor here. And I say that as person who is in the "they worked out their issues" crowd. She landed the big fish, it's going to take a lot for her to throw it back. When was the last time you saw a fiancé leave a rich NFL player because of... anything?

nanomoz":a25n0s3i said:
If Goodell had access to this footage during the course of the original investigation and appeal, he should be fired immediately.

It would be really cool if this sentiment caught fire on twitter. The twitter outrage machine could actually prove useful for once. Goodell's incompetence and dishonesty on a great many issues has worn out his welcome for me for quite some time.
 

Sgt. Largent

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2012
Messages
25,560
Reaction score
7,616
salamander":1uvwkkm6 said:
Cartire":1uvwkkm6 said:
I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money.

If this was a clear pattern of abuse with Rice I would agree with you, but this could be a single isolated incident. Maybe she just knows him better than you and thinks he wont do it again.

It's not up to us or the league to decide whether a player and his wife have a good marriage other than one instance of domestic violence.

If Ray Rice and his wife love each other and can work through this, more power to them. But the NFL has to show it's employees that there is zero tolerance for domestic violence. Goodell screwed up bigtime, and now we find out he might have lied about it all with seeing the video and then claiming not? Or not seeing it even though he could have?
 

Largent80

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2007
Messages
36,653
Reaction score
5
Location
The Tex-ASS
Cartire":2l4nbnd1 said:
sc85sis":2l4nbnd1 said:
Let's try to avoid assuming Rice's now wife is a gold digger because she went ahead and married the guy. There are plenty of people who stay in abusive relationships for various reasons. None of us know this woman; we cannot realistically put ourselves in her shoes.

As for Ray, he obviously has issues. Hopefully getting fired will be the wake up call he needs because if it isn't--I don't even want to contemplate that. There is no excuse for abusing another human being, an animal, et al.

I have an oppisite view of this. She needs to be called out as well when it comes to her decision to both support him, apologize, and remain with him. I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money. But regardless of any of those reasons, these women arent going to change their ways if we dont call it out. We cant constantly enable them by "understanding" their decision. we can be critical of the choices they make as well*.

*Quick note: I dont mean the decisions to lead up to being abused. I mean the decisions to remain with the abuser. So please everyone, dont go all Jezebel on me.

Cartire brings a realistic view to the table which I previously outlined. My wife's business is devoted to battered women, abuse and family issues. Regardless of what any of you think should be said, there are plenty of women that take this abuse with no answer to the question as to WHY.

They just do it. In this case, is she a gold digger, or is she a victim of love or any other of the many categories.

Only she knows. However, none of her opinions matter when there is undeniable proof of assault.
 

Smelly McUgly

New member
Joined
Mar 6, 2013
Messages
4,282
Reaction score
0
Location
God's Country AKA Cascadia AKA The Pacific Northwe
In general, I do worry that the DV policy the NFL has adopted will make it less likely that DV victims come forward due to a mix of internal and external pressure on the victim.

When you look at how Rice AND the whole Ravens organization handled this thing, it makes you wonder how much pressure the Rice and/or the organization put on Rice's fiancee to apologize.
 

salamander

Member
Joined
Aug 27, 2012
Messages
209
Reaction score
6
Sgt. Largent":2sjuewgj said:
salamander":2sjuewgj said:
Cartire":2sjuewgj said:
I understand some women do it out of fear. Some are broken and think they really are in the wrong, and some endure it so they can stay with the money.

If this was a clear pattern of abuse with Rice I would agree with you, but this could be a single isolated incident. Maybe she just knows him better than you and thinks he wont do it again.

It's not up to us or the league to decide whether a player and his wife have a good marriage other than one instance of domestic violence.

If Ray Rice and his wife love each other and can work through this, more power to them. But the NFL has to show it's employees that there is zero tolerance for domestic violence. Goodell screwed up bigtime, and now we find out he might have lied about it all with seeing the video and then claiming not? Or not seeing it even though he could have?


I agree with you. I just think its a bit insulting to the wife to assume you know better than she does. We don't know either of them personally, and we weren't there. I don't think anyone could have a full understanding of the situation looking at 10 second window of a relationship that is years old.
 
Top