Greetings Hawks Fans! I am Coach Shitano from Tampa

[Throwdown]

This is classic

Best Rival fan we've ever had, no joke.

 

[seedhawk]

Will you be flying in on a larger plane? Needed to ask cuz Costco has a special on TP this week. Might help you wipe up some of the mess.

 

[Coach Shitano]

Did you want to punch Josh Freeman in the face? What did you think of Tom Coughlin jumping in your face after your victory-formation smash? Will you start blitzing shot-gun victory formations?

Yes I wanted to punch Josh Freeman, but I also like to lie to the press and fans, so I didn't do it.

I couldn't understand why Tom was so mad with the V formation. At Rutgers University, we we ALWAYS did that when we were losing.

It seems like teams are adapting to my style of coaching. Hard to get to the QB on a victory-kneel-down blitz when the QB is not under center.

 

[Sac]

Hey Greg,

What is with the massive man crush you have on Bill Bellicheat?

I heard you were practically wetting yourself just being around him during the Pats/Bucs shared scrimmage.

 

[Coach Shitano]

What are the chances you're getting fired before the season ends!?

Despite what Buc Fans want, it seems I'll be able to finish the season (I hope).

When Buc fans get mad they become lunatics (even though they don't attend games). There are billboards and all kinds of media crap on the radio & TV here against me.

I was given the "OK" from the owners after the Thursday Night Debacle last week.

I hope the owners gave me the ok on my merits and not because they want Bridgewater.

 

[Coach Shitano]

Da hell happened to your secondary?

As head coach, I demand that Darrelle Revis play zone instead of lock down Man to Man. I don't care how much he makes per year. He has to play in MY system.

Also because I'm an ex-college coach, I have no idea what the hell I'm doing schematically in the NFL.

I miss Rutgers.

So... He's not a better corner than Richard Sherman? Because Sherm can play either and still lock fools down.

I think we've answered the question of who's the best CB in the league here, fellas.

Not so fast... Revis plays EXTREMELY well in zone. Revis can do ANYTHING you would ask a CB to to do, and his capabilities REALLY SHINE when he's asked to lock a receiver down Man to Man. He is a bright spot on our team.








That's why I ask him to play zone. Because I intend to destroy the Bucs...

 

[RynoHawk]

how does this have ANYTHING TO DO with Seahawks, I sense more NFL related...

 

[Coach Shitano]

More of a request instead of a question.

Can you please wear your old school orange uni's this Sunday?

k, Thanks!

Buccaneer Bruce! Love the old uni's.

Thanks for the love on the old Uni's. We were supposed to wear them earlier this season against the Eagles on our throwback week. But just prior to that, the NFL said we couldn't change helmets (yeah, it sounds crazy). So I'm not sure when we'll ever be able to wear them again.

 

[SDHawk]

What do you think about me changing my fantasy team name to Revis and Rut-head?

 

[Coach Shitano]

Hi Coach Shitano. Two questions:

If you had Russell Wilson on your team, would you run him out of town to play Mike Glennon like you did Josh Freeman in an attempt to overthink the QB position in exactly the same fashion that NCSU once did?

Also, can you talk to Domenik or the Glazers or whoever and bring back the creamsicle unis and the pirate with the cutlass in his teeth on a full-time basis?

For your second question: I have no influence on the uniforms (refer to an earlier post I made).

Regarding your first question I'll say this:

Russell Wilson is a shorter version of what Josh Freeman (6 foot 5) WOULD have been, if only he had been coached properly (he suffered many coaching changes via HC, OC, and QB coach through out his career).

When I, Coach Shitano came into the picture, I made it a point to DESTROY him.

After I successfully destroyed Freeman (to the point he was sucking his thumb in the fetal position), I inserted my guy Mike Glennon who I had tried to recruit from High school when I was back at Rutgers.

In other words, I would try to have Russell sucking his thumb so that I could get "my guy" in. I need players for MY system or I can't function. I don't want to adapt to player abilities.

I NEED PEOPLE THAT FIT IN MY SYSTEM!!! I DON"T CARE WHAT YOUR TALENTS ARE!!!

 

[fenderbender123]

I can't pronounce Shitano...can I call you something else for short?

 

[hawkfan68]

Don't you have better things to do than to be on a fan message board? Like maybe...learn how to coach?

 

[Coach Shitano]

Will you be flying in on a larger plane? Needed to ask cuz Costco has a special on TP this week. Might help you wipe up some of the mess.

Not sure what TP is, but if it's anything less than MRSA, then we'll be prepared..

 

[Coach Shitano]

Hey Greg,

What is with the massive man crush you have on Bill Bellicheat?

I heard you were practically wetting yourself just being around him during the Pats/Bucs shared scrimmage.

Bill who? (orgasm).

Oh, you mean Bellicheck who gave a good reference for me to join the NFL? (orgasm)

Naw, we're just friends. I coached his son at Rutgers.

we're cool (orgasm).

 

[Evil_Shenanigans]

Just make sure you guys scrub up before they play us. You can keep that MRSA in FLA TYVFM!

 

[Coach Shitano]

What do you think about me changing my fantasy team name to Revis and Rut-head?

Whatever floats your boat.

 

[Sports Hernia]

As head coach of the Bucs, I was thrilled about your struggles this past Monday. You will not blow us out. We will LOSE to you in GLORIOUS FASHION!

Ask me questions about the Bucs.

Hey coach, You cant be any worse than the niner trolls, so welcome! :th2thumbs:

 

[Coach Shitano]

I can't pronounce Shitano...can I call you something else for short?

Well, I don't see how that can be different from many of the OTHER names Buc fans call me.

Whatever the name you have in mind, Buc fans have called me worse..

 

[OrFan]

Coach shitcanned, Are you going to be bringing your cannon with you so that it can be fired every time the Seahawks score? I figure there is no way in hell you will score enough at home to use up all the powder before it goes bad.

 

[Coach Shitano]

Don't you have better things to do than to be on a fan message board? Like maybe...learn how to coach?

It's funny that you ask that...

Buc fans wonder why I have THE MOST ASSISTANT COACHES IN THE LEAGUE and is still 0-7.

They also wonder why I have people film my players on the sideline when we are losing. I try to tell them that I do it so that no player laughs or smiles during a loss (real talk), but for some reason it infuriates Buc fans.

Would it infuriate Hawks fans to hear about this if you were 0-7?

There's other stuff that I do that infuriates Bucs fans that haven't been mentioned. But I digress...