"We have to vote to keep these Coyotes so we can find out just what the NHL is, and if anybody here even cares about it." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Nobody has ever abused us quite as kindly as you good folks have, so we really have to vote yes on this deal." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Three quarters of all jobs in Glendale exist solely because of the Coyotes." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"We plan on installing a salary cap on municipal services such as police and fire departments, because that's how dedicated we are to hockey here." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"What's $90 Mil among friends, anyway?" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"If the team moved, Glendale would lose thousands of dollars worth of revenue from Canadian tourists." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"The annual operating cost for the Glendale arena is 10 percent of whatever we can raise in tomorrow's telethon, so let's get calling." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Can someone pass a hat around and take up a collection so we can keep this team here?" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"How can we lose this team when we just learned what icing is?" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"In this economy, losing the team would mean devastation to thousands of Glendale-area dentists." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Losing the team would mean thousands of fans of other teams would have to pay higher prices to see those teams at other venues." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"At least we aren't the Predators." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"If the Coyotes leave town, where else will the good citizens of Glendale be able to find enough ice to escape from the blazing temperatures outside?" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"This meeting is proof that Coyote fans do in fact exist, therefore we must keep the team." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"We really owe it to both our season ticket holders to keep the team here." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"There are literally hundreds of hockey fans down here who would be devastated if we lost the team." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"You can tell what a dedicated hockey fan base we have here in Arizona, because they all showed up for this meeting." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"We are going to mortgage goddamn city hall if that's what it takes to keep the Coyotes here in the desert." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"We fully trust Gary Bettman, and that shows how educated and dedicated we are as hockey fans here in Arizona." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"We plan on dropping funding from firefighters to support the Coyotes, as that's money that never goes to use here in Arizona anyway." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"If we stop throwing money on this fire, it will go out, and we can't have that." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Vote yes on this deal and receive a free hockey puck to celebrate the start of next season." - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"High sticking, boarding, icing, cross checking, fighting, penalizing, zamboniing, curling, the luge - see we know our hockey terms!" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"Just to show how dedicated to our hockey down here, we're dropping the gloves right here tonight for a bench-clearing brawl!" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).
"The Coyotes will move from Arizona when hell freezes over, and it ain't even cold here!" - The entire Glendale City Council (probably).