I wish the NFL took more a more streamlined (and less complex) approach to the rule system. I agree with the OP, holding can apparently be called on just about any play (according to some), and varies from very ticky tack (as we saw tonight) to blatant. But it doesn't have to be....
I was thinking about a change to the rule system and lineman game-day equipment that could basically eliminate 80+% of holding calls. It may be a terrible idea, but I'll float it to see what you all think....
My rule change would be to take every non-eligible lineman (other than the center) on the offense (of every team), and force them to wear a type of mitten that prevents them from being able to grasp an opponent with their hands. They could still wrap their arms around a defender, tackle them, etc. to be penalized for holding. But the idea would be that pulling on a jersey would be rendered impossible, and this would eliminate a lot of the flags. It should also ensure that holding is more obvious and less subject to individual opinion when it occurs.
Good idea or bad, it's clearly the nuances of officiating that frustrates fans. If the NFL were smart, they would implement as many work-around's as they could into the rules and equipment of the game that made officiating easier and more consistent.
We live in a world where nearly every industry has automation, and AI is taking over... Why is the NFL coming in last in this effort even among other professional sports? There are probably a hundred great idea's for replacing officials in this game, and it's probably an effort that would unify fans (generally speaking).