Inside the urinal is a scented hockey puck with Kaepernicks dumb schnoz on it.
Picture this. You have a few too many Mac n Jacks and realize you havent pissed since before you walked into the stadium. We are kicking their ass, so you stumble up the stairs (well maybe down, as only BFS and I sit at the true lower level) to drop a quart. As you walk the stairs in a stupor, you hear PEHAWKS PEHAWKS lets go PEHAWKS, oh sure you are buzzed and you know you have to piss and it probably is SEAhawks, but it doesn't matter. You are proud of who you are. Damn it. You are a man. This is your domain. Those that know you want nothing more than to enjoy a game vs the Niners with their old buddy Pehawk. Those that don't know you are missing out on not just a man, but a true 12th man. Stumbling over the stairs, you turn the corner to wait in line for the shitter. I should just piss in the garbage can, so you think. But no, you have more class than that. But not a bad idea for later. Some frat boy walks past the quiet line of restroom waiters and yells SEA!!!!! waits for someone to yell Hawks!, no one does. You hear him echo off down the corridor, as others avoid him, SEA...sea....Damn is someone shitting in the urinal trough? Gosh damn, niner fans! They should have their own shitters. Somewhere they can do the train. Haha. Damn you are witty, but you really have to piss. If this line doesn't go any faster, I will just piss over someone's shoulder in the general direction of said restroom. FINALLY, your turn. Your pants are around your ankles, briefs, too. You grab that wee Irish bastard and let er go. DAMN! Ahh, jeez. Whew! Then you look down and see the urinal cake, a usual after thought, has the face of Papaki. You hunker down, bend slightly at the knee, breathe deep and PISS! You piss like the wind. You think that if Jesus peed, he peed like this. It is sobering, if only for a brief moment. As you stamper back to your seat, you notice the beer vendors. You buy a round and carry it back. Money doesnt matter, those guys get the next round and you dont have to piss again. You are Pehawk. You are man.