Hooray, I can finally let the cat out of the bag! I have been dying to tell folks here about it, but due to the circumstances, I couldn't. I can now!

As many of you know, we fought long and hard to get back home after I retired from the Navy. And it's been completely awesome. But recently things have changed and a new opportunity has opened up. Actually two opportunities have opened up. We're going back to California. The wife has taken a high-paying executive job there, and I have been offered an opportunity that will allow me to take advantage of my rather unique and specialized skill set of linguistics.

We've been on the phone with our realtor nearly night and day for the past three weeks, and have found a place. It's a foreclosure, and we're getting it for a steal, but it's going to need a whole lot of fixing up. She sent us some pictures of it in its prime that I thought I'd share with you. The previous owner pictured himself somewhat of a "Rocky Balboa" or "Rambo" type, and couldn't keep out of a fight. The house took the brunt of things.

Obviously it looks a lot different now, and it will take some considerable effort to get it back to looking like this, but it's a golden opportunity, one that even trumps staying here in Washington! We are STOKED!

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

So, what, does it look more like Jesse Pinkman's house in Season 4 right now?

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Super Bowl Champions XVLIII

Congrats, dude. I don't blame you for moving to the nicer weather.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

Actually, Robert Swift owned it prior to Sailor.

Oh, and congrats Sailor. And dont EVER make me break character and be nice, again.

Wow, that place is awesome. Enjoy!

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"We ran into a buzz saw," - John Fox, Super Bowl XLVIII

Thanks guys! I'm so excited about this. I have been asked to collaborate with one of the studios (unfortunately I can't say which one just yet) on an upcoming project that includes work in an exotic locale where I just happen to speak the language. It's quite a surreal dream at this point.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

What languages do you fluently speak?

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

Ebonics. Duh.

Several, actually. Not sure I should really get into much of a discussion about it yet, even as far as that's concerned, as the studio has me under a contract with very strict confidentiality clauses. All I can say is that I'll be involved with a large upcoming project in a foreign country, and that my involvement goes beyond just a bit of translating.

Kind of wild how it happened. Seems one of their execs came across my Twitter feed and found out I'd helped Joe Hill with some translation about a year ago, and started asking questions. Then this came out of nowhere. Hollywood, here we come!

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Bad ass!! Let me know when you're all settled in. I'll come down and stay with you for an extended and open-ended length of time.

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Tanzania¹² "ALERT THE LEGION!!!"

That's pretty awesome. Wish you all the best. You mentioned Central California, and given your wife's executive job, and the fact you won't mention the actual location, it's got to be in the heart of 49er land. I'm guessing North Bay.

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Super Bowl Champions XVLIII

That is a very nice place. Congratulations! (assuming this isn't an April Fool's joke )

North Orange County, so quite a bit south from the Bay Area. We do have a bunch of friends still up in that area, so we'll be up to visit quite often I'm sure, but we'll be down in the land of the apathetic NFL fan. Not that I'll be around for a lot of next year.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Congrats Sailor...sounds like everything's coming up roses for you right now. Hope it all works out for you there.

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Sailor, you turd.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

My mind must be going. I swear there was mention of central CA. D'oh.

In Orange, there's a great little store owned by The Bruery called the Provisions. I recommend it for some experimental/sour ales.

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Super Bowl Champions XVLIII

Its too bad you're living right as the weather is opening up here in Washington. That place looks magnificent in its heyday. I'm taking a stab here, but поздравления!

Thanks. And yea, the irony of that hasn't escaped me. Seems someone in Hollywood has a sense of humor after all.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Hmm... sounds like some Argo shit going on. Are you writing a fake script starring Dennis Rodman and Kim Jung Un, (or whatever his name is).

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Abrams is consulting with him about speaking in Aurebesh for the upcoming Disney Star Wars film.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

Heh, J! Don't I wish! That would be pretty damn cool. I have a feeling this one's going to be just as fun when it's all said and done, though.

And no, Roland, it's not "Aurebesh". I think I can safely say that. Although I have learned alphabet scripts harder than that one!

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

How do you know it's not Ewok? Disney gotta sell those dolls.

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Super Bowl Champions XVLIII

Well, I guess Sailor falls under that "cuddly retard" category. You may be correct. It could also be Huttese...

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

That´s an awesome house Sailor, congratulations!

Congrats! (maybe early, as it isn't the second quite yet..)

Remember, you know a Spanish Linguist who is willing to relocate to CA if you need it....

Very true. Unfortunately Spanish is not in the mix here, I think I can safely say. I do know a bunch of folks who speak what they need that are on standby in case of need. I don't want to push my luck too much here, as it's all still very much potential this and tentative that right now.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Very nice pad, congrats Sailor.

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"Are we rockin' and rollin' or what?!''

-- Seattle coach Pete Carroll, celebrating with his coaches after the Seahawks pulled off a trade with the Jets, netting running back Leon Washington on Saturday, via Seahawks.com

And which room is mine?

And don't forget. I am a cunning linguist if needed.

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We speak German around the house fairly often... for no good reason, we're just weird. I also had a solid grasp of Spanish before my wife came along and I started teaching myself German. The result of that is that when I have to break out my Spanish to translate at work, I tend to spew this bizarre Germish hybrid that exists nowhere in nature.

And I can transliterate it into Cyrillic to REALLY jack with people.

Oh, and congrats!

No, there's a reason, Himmler.

Here is the link to the house we're getting. He offered me a good deal on it because of my role in the project.

And I'm happy to say I can go ahead and spill the beans regarding the film's location. It's New Zealand! So I'll need to hire an accent coach, in addition to my ability in the language.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Tolkien nerd!

Just read this...holy sheep shit!

Congratulations, Sailor! Fuggin amazing!!

I was going to point out on the how awesome Seattle weather post that my family and I are on Waikiki during the kids Spring Break, but this news beats the shit out of me being on vacation!

I am so happy for you! Get a giant 12 flag for the garages. I toast a Bushmills and longboard lager in your honor!!

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"it'd be a newborn deer" - pehawk

New Zealand is = to PNW, almost a mirror image.

Way to go Jonathan !!!!!

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For those who didn't catch the cryptic clues dropped along the way, no I am not buying Sylvester Stalone's $4.5 million dollar house, moving to Hollywood, and jetting off to New Zealand to star in a movie. Would be nice, but the PNW is stuck with me for the indefinite future. April Fools Day was fun this year. Much belly laughs were had.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

We should all borrow Dunces hat.

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Solid AF Sailor. Just preparing my congratulatory post until I read your last one.

Maybe next year!

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SUPER BOWL 48 CHAMPIONS!!!!!!!!

RIP ROAD WOES 12/2/2012

You all should feel ashamed.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

And you should be proud for not replying, immediately, with "Great April Fools Joke".

The joke's really on Sailor, because he exposed the dreams he's never going to fulfill. I bet he cried a little.

(Really well thought out joke, btw.)

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Super Bowl Champions XVLIII

Don't be mad because I figured it out right away. Sailor asked me to go along with it, so I didn't ruin it. He can confirm.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

That's okay, I got Sailor REALLY good with my "lets nuke the moon" thread. He actually believed I'm dumb and crazy....what a rube!

Yeah, he's a total rube for believing that.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

True story. He called me out on page one. I nuked his post to keep it going a bit longer, thus the "Sailor, you turd!" post by him there.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

We've learned two things from this.

First, Roland HAS to explain or ruin any joke or gag to quell his insecurity (most likely being teased in HS feeds the NEED to be in on things). Second, Sailor has NO real gag skills, he simply possesses mod rights.

Admittedly, I did feel a split second of guilt over my abuse of powers.

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World Champion Seattle Seahawks football. It's an addiction, and there is no cure.

Actually, if this were true, I'd have kept trying to ruin it. Instead, I went in cahoots with Sailor.

Also, I wasn't popular in high school, but it was basically intentional; I considered the town to be a hick-filled craphole, which it was and still is, and most of my classmates knew I thought it. I had a few core friends that were really good friends, and I was just fine with that. I even got my ass beaten by a 6'3"ish big upperclassman when I was a freshman (he was a junior) because I was chatting with a friend in metal shop about how much this town sucked, (one of my good friends that was going to move once he graduated) and he stood up and shouted at nearly the top of his lungs so everyone could hear, "*******it, we ain't ******* HICKS!" Being the smartass that I am, my response was "You 'ain't?'" He then proceeded to punch me straight in the jaw and we started to fight, but it was quickly broken up by the teacher. I have no illusions that I would have won that fight, he was athletic and had 60+ pounds on me, though I was taking Aikido at the time and could have easily avoided him for a long time had I wanted to.

Since I didn't feel like getting jumped in the parking lot by him and a few of his friends, I kept my opinions a bit more quiet after that; so it did teach me a lesson, you might say. Namely, that people don't like the truth. I knew I'd never live there again once I was old enough to get out, and I didn't like a significant percentage of my classmates. Many of them were either racist/bigoted, or liked living there and never had any plans to move. Going from Miami, FL to Marshall, WI was horrible and I forever hate small towns after having experienced one. I also dislike parents that raise their kids in them, because then a lot of those kids don't know any better. It's pathetic how many classmates I had when I was 16 years old that had never left the state in their whole lives. A few had never even left the county.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

Liar.

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Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.

You were just underrating the county.

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That's a good one. I see you still have yet to reply in the other thread; it was a serious request.

However, go spend some time in rural Dane County, WI and then explain how I underrated it. Maybe I just didn't spend enough time at Cascade Mountain in Portage, WI; which is in the county directly north of Dane County. That "mountain" has a grand total of 388 feet of elevation from base. A true marvel of the skiing world.

_________________
Sam Bradford is a game changer.

*He can change a win into a loss.
*He can change a loss into a win by getting injured.
*RedAlice is right.