Fourth, he'd play the games wearing Jorts if the NFL would let him. I don't normally like total rednecks or people that remind me of Will Ferrell, but Allen is one of my favorite non-Seahawks.
I'm dying right now! JORTS! HAHAHA! You win the internet kearly. Shows over folks, nothing to see here!
Oh my God thank you so much for the great laugh! As badly as I want Suh, Allen is right up there with him in my books now and is probably a more realistic possibility for the reasons you listed. He could probably come in and have a Patrick Kearly, I mean Kerney, season or two for the Hawks as well.